Mother Nature Offers Halfhearted Condolences to Mankind

In a rare public statement, Mother Nature said today that she really, honest-to-god feels sorry for mankind as it suffers through a coronavirus pandemic.

“That’s tough, mankind, really tough,” she told attendees at a UN conference on the relationship between deforestation and pandemics. “Must suck to be you.”

According to virologists, deforestation increases the likelihood of viral transmission between animals and humans and is considered a leading cause of recent increases in epidemics and pandemics.

“The 40% of of wildlife populations that hasn’t been destroyed by human activity since 1974,” she added, “sends its thoughts and prayers, too.”

Photo copyright SoStark

Recommended Posts